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Kyle : It's the kindergarten teacher, Ms. Police Sergeant : The blonde? Kyle : Yeah. Policeman 1 : Some young boy is having sex with Ms. Kyle : Yes. Policeman 1 : Nice. Police Sergeant : Nice. Kyle : What? No, you don't understand Policeman 1 : You sure they've had sex?
Kyle : Yeah! Policeman 2 : Has she performed oral sex on him? Kyle : I think so. Policeman 2 : Nice. Policeman 1 : Nice! Police Sergeant : So, wait. What's the crime? Policeman 1 : The crime is she isn't doing it with me. Kyle : Hey! He's totally underage. She's taking advantage of him!
Police Sergeant : You're right. We're sorry. This is serious. We need to track this student down and. Police Sergeant : give him his "Luckiest Boy in America" medal right away. Kyle : Ike, you need to have a life. Have fun. Weiner, what do you know?
Do you need to tinkle, tinkle? Yes, I do think so! Eric Cartman : Hey man, I had to rat you out but I want you to know that I've got nothing against you. Butters : Uhh Eric Cartman : You know you've gotta go with Christ, dude. Butters : Well I do Eric Cartman : You could go one way, and wander around the halls without a pass, or you could see the light, man!
Kyle : Guys, can I talk to you? Stan : Sure, dude. Kyle : I need you to keep quiet about this, all right? Cartman : Brahs, it's almost class time. I need you to start clearin' the hallways, alright? Kyle : Not now, Cartman! I have really serious problems! Stan : Dude, what's the matter? Kyle : The kindergarten teacher is having sex with my little brother.